Tuesday, December 14, 2010

To Live Deliberately

I can hear the birds chirping. I don't think I've stopped to listen to them all semester. Finally, now, I can rest and listen to the birds chirp, eat a proper breakfast, and breathe. It's hard to articulate a breath, to put it into words. I think discernment of people's breaths is a good measure of how well you know someone. This "ahhh" was the most releasing breath. I don't think I've had a day like this all semester. One in which, I literally have no expectations. I have zero class assignments that I'm putting off. I have no concrete plans for the day. Only time to rest. I'm surrounded by stacks of clean clothes, and stacks of dirty clothes. There are books and papers strewn arbitrarily throughout my room, set wherever I last studied with them. Among the remnants of finals week there are also countless coffee mugs, a handful of water cups, numerous candy wrappers, lots of misplaced pens (not a single one in it's proper place), folded blank pieces of paper ready to receive last ditch notes, and more windows open on my Mr. Mac than I really know what to do with.

I changed my clothes today (typically not a significant detail about my life until i realized i'd been wearing the same clothes for two days last night); I managed to put together the most fashionable finals attire possible to take my last exam this morning at 8am. I have always heart the saying ....Dress to Impress! :)
[brown cords, black and gray striped wool cardigan, tie dye shirt, with a purple coat & gray converses]. I know you're jealous.. you don't even have to say it.

I've considered taking a nap, but would much rather enjoy my day of no expectations. Perhaps I will understand a little more what Thoreau means when he says,

"I went into the woods because I want to live deliberately. I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life...to put to rout all that was not life; and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived."

[I hope he didn't intend life deliberately to be void of spontaneity... ]

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